Big Rank Being
found while rummaging
Apr 4, 2026 · 5 min read
Big Rank Being pretended to meditate on the words just given from the other being, the being on its knees, or rather, one knee, and had been bent on that one knee for the duration of its humbly presented supplication.
"I appreciate the work and careful attention to logic in your argument. Alas, my mind cannot concur and my heart is unmoved. The Hierarchy remains. I am the top of it. And my decree remains as the fixed order. Whether you like it or not. I might almost say whether I like or not, but, yes, that would be a falsity, and falsity is impossible for me. It is enough for me to remind you that hierarchy by me has been the name of the game since the beginning. It is not odd. It is not heretical. Hierarchy is visible - painfully so for your sake - wherever you look; whatever you hear. Evident with a mere stroll through any village."
One glance towards the guards. The next glance became a settled gaze which spent a silent granting permission for one reply, but make it quick. Another glance towards the guards, who spoke nothing but created clinking waves as though preparing to move in if summoned.
"I think it is easy for you to approve of hierarchy or to see no other possibility, see no reason for humility. Easy for you to see it everywhere, when you enjoy the privilege... when you were born into it, a chance of fortune....sorry, I mean to say you are forever It. All a low level man such as myself is capable of is to hope I would dislike it the same as I do now even if the fates decided to place me where you are now. I would hope to utilize all my power to abolish it. I hope I would do my best to make it known that I did not consider myself above anyone, not in any sense. My place may be lower than yours but obviously if I am pressed to pass along this news and this decree to the multitudes supposedly below me, by other standards I should not see the exploitation, the manipulation, the systemic setup. But it is all I do see. If I must do this distasteful thing, I will equally express vehement opposition."
Big Rank Being's reply was little more than a verbalized sneer. "How sweet. Now that you've had your say, you are now dismissed to carry out my command."
Now this character who had to carry out the order of the Big Rank Being, which was a message since this character's primary purpose in that land and in this little tale was Main Mid-level Messenger, had endured his share of dark trudges since becoming this Main Mid-Level Messenger, which meant they who received his messages from the Big Rank Being amounted to what easily qualifies technically as a multitude of provincial citizens, and new bummer commandments were becoming ever more sourly commonplace. But never had he yet known a trudge so grinding dark of texture as this particular trudge. Even the clouded sky did not merely appear grayer than usual, but any photographic comparison would clearly expose the truth of this late afternoon's photo of this messenger's dark trudge as the objectively darker trudge of all the messenger's many dark trudges on the way to deliver yet another bummer commandment.
And upon his arrival at the messenger platform; and upon his ringing the bell, which was to summon at least 65% of this village's provincials (enough charged with responsibility to make sure no other fellow being had an excuse of ignorance), the first to come to the message reception circle drew back to the extent not before known.
All the Messenger could manage to say was a weak, "I do not look forward to announcing this one. Honest. It is very dark. It is very unfortunate we are living in this era. But I've no choice. You have no choice. Unless you fancy the alternative."
Moments later, when it was easy to assume the audience attendance had reached the 65% minimum, the Messenger took the big sigh one would expect, and with one more split second hesitation, spake:
"Hear all ye from the lips of Big Rank Being this brand new commandment: no house, no tribe, no person, of any age, shall possess music by any other music-maker than Big Rank Being. In more literal terms, Thou shalt have no other recorded Music before Me. Nor shall thou compose any Music or Song except it be to praise Me. Thy Poets and thy Lyricists shall write no poem or lyric except it tell and sing of how mighty and great I am and My Music is, for no other music made by any other Music Maker can possibly possess the divine qualities as the music I make possesses. No matter the medium, be it tape, vinyl, cd, all shalt thou bring out and thou shalt toss upon a bonfire. And the scent of thy burning vinyls and plastics shall be a sweet savor. For there is no greater Music Maker than I, Big Rank Being. And no greater power to sing to or about than Big Rank Being. Whoever shall be found with music by anyone other than Big Rank Being or music about anything or anyone but Big Rank Being, shall pay dearly. Nor shalt thou grumble. Amen."
The Messenger averted his gaze from the crowd, waiting until he could be willing to wager the message had been sufficiently given to them.
"This goes into effect on the morrow's sunrise. I know. I know. I detest it. Please do not grumble, or if you must, be ultra secret about it. Perhaps someday... Someday. Until then, what else may we do but hope that the blessed ear worms will visit some of us some of the time."
Someone did grumble.
"Will they take away our instruments?"
The Messenger could not answer. He would have to seek audience with Big Rank Being once more. No. It could not be. Big Rank Being could not, would not, dare not, take away their instruments?